I make a conscious effort to try and make myself happy these days (these days = widowhood). Perhaps more accurately, I make an extra effort to NOT make myself miserable. Yup, that's more like it.
Truth is, it's not that I need to be brimming with happiness ~ I just don't want to be un-happy. And sad. More so, I don't want to be ungrateful.
Truth is, it's not that I need to be brimming with happiness ~ I just don't want to be un-happy. And sad. More so, I don't want to be ungrateful.
And how do I do that? By being contented with His blessings.
“Part of the happiness of a son of Adam consists in his pleasure with what Allah has decreed for him, part of the misery of the son of Adam consists in his abandonment of asking God's blessing and part of the misery of the son of Adam consists in his displeasure with what Allah has decreed for him.”
Alhamdulillah, I am thankful to Him for all the provisions He has given me. Having said that, as a weak human being that I am, I must admit that it is sometimes a challenge to be fully contented with what I have been bestowed with ~ Astaghfirulahalazim! Nevertheless, patience and ridha is a virtue I have continously learn to embrace with each passing day.
And how else could I have come to learn patience and ridha but through His grace?
!الله أكبر
6 comments:
This is life, my dear... That is the battle and test of our Imaan. I have come to realise that only NOW (after widowed) have I come to understand the concept of Imaan, Ihsan and Islam, as taught in school decades ago. Only NOW do I understand what is tawakkal and redha.
Let's continue praying for His rahmah; to lead us into being good Muslims, successfully making it over the endless hurdles ahead. Faith or Imaan is Yakin, and that is the only thing that keeps us on our feet.
You've done well, and will do much better, have no fear!
D dearest,
Thanks for the confidence in me. Honestly, most times I don't feel like I can rise above it all, yet somehow, deep down I believe the All-Knowing will not dissapoint me and I guess that is Faith/Imaan -- Yakin that you talked about. It is all a miracle, isn't it?
Another challenge is to be the ultimate Muslim -- I am far from there, there's so much to catch up on and at times I feel like I'm not progreessing at all!! Yes, I pray for His rahmah and ridha for I am nothing without them :-(
I am no expert in rendering meaningful and useful thoughts. But after reading you for awhile, you to me, are just examplary in many ways MHB. It's not about being the ultimate or the perfect person, who is anyway except for Rasullulah saw? You are full of humility, compassion, love and care for the people around you.
And if that is not a reason to appreciate and celebrate, I don't know what is then. Your daughters just celebrated you and im sure if it was up to them, birthdays should be an everyday event! So they can celebrate you on a daily basis, which I'm sure in their little ways they do that already.
It's alright MHB, you don't need to be happy or make an effort to be happy all the time. We are created with emotions, lots of them. Happy just makes a fraction of the whole pie. Take it one step at a time alright. We are listening and praying for you and your family's well being. And prayers from ibu2 di seluruh dunia who read you are no matched to any power in this world. You are in good hands. Take care.
(wiping tears...)
sebakkk...
Wiz dearie... I had heart palpitations reading what you wrote. You are not only my Royal 'sugar high'ness, you are also my fav wizard of words...
You are so right about happy being just a fraction of the whole pie -- and within that happy fraction itself the definition varies... I guess happiness for me is to have peace within myself -- I am struggling daily to gain His ridha, seeking His forgiveness and longing for His compassion. I struggle with myself -- and that is the greatest battle!!
Alhamdulillah, I am blessed to have friends like you and all the ibu2 seluuh dunia who have given me the support I never even imagined!! God bless all of you!!
Again, I am so touched, dear... Thank You!!
Dear MHB
Not my first time here but this time, teruja to leave a comment.
You are a special one, sesungguhnya Allah tidak akan menduga umat nya selagi mereka tidak sanggup menanggungnya. Hence you are privileged. Chin up dear.
tireless mom -- thank you for the kind words... I try to convince myself that everyday. Allah sure loves us all and tests us in different ways. He is after all, the All-Knowing. Thanks again...
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